I miss you, Michael

I just watched Janet on American Idol. She killed it! Not hair, catsuit, Christian Louboutin's, dancing; it was GREAT!!!

And it made me think about Michael...I miss you Michael Jackson! In processing this breakup I wonder... I took Michael's death really hard. I mean crying hard in my bed, followed by a mild depression. Michael and I were together for 32 years of my life. I have know him as long as I've known my family. He was everything I did all the time. Posters, stickers, pins, hats, gloves, jackets, tshirts, concerts; all Michael. I was in love with him and, it's safe to say, we grew apart. The surgeries, the charges; our relationship was a challenging one. Then he would come back...an album, a movie and I would be like Yes! He's still around. Crazy, but there he is.

His death was a blow to me. Part of me is embarassed because I know that having such deep fellings towards someone I never met. is wierd. But, that's how I feel.

Here's a thought:

My depression following the death of my "first love," hit me so hard that I sabotaged my current relationship.

But I never met him....I know, I know!!!